It has been a right brain extrovert month in so many ways. Going, going, busy, busy with no focus. And confidence, what’s that? Do you ever feel like you caret finish even one project?
So finally with all of these things that NEED to . done, I put them aside and thought about what I WANTED to do today. Since there was someone around to attach me ride, I decided I WANTED to do that. Which horse? My brain went to which ones NEEDED to be ridden, and I checked my thoughts. NO Which did I want, for whatever selfish shallow reason. Since it has been awhile since I have ridden due to all of these projects and health reasons, I wanted someone safe. Dusty. I always let everyone else ride Dusty, but I LOVE to ride her. She is energetic, yet smooth. I just needed to feel a horse underneath me.
Before even mounting, she was determined to munch on every green blade of grass. I circled her online, asserting appropriate phases until she trotted without sneaking a bite. Then I mounted up and headed to another green pasture We walked a bit in new environment, but I had a PLAN of trotting some figure eights. She had more plans of eating. When I asked her to “go” she said “no” with a little hump of her back, I redirected her rear end in a circle. We continued this little talk, over the next few minutes of her idea • vs • my idea. Instead of focusing strongly on my figure 8 patten, I REDIRECTED her tense thoughts with a sideways movement at walk or trot. This helped her to relax into my idea instead of being direct line and picking a fight with her. As soon as she relaxed into trotting MY circle, I relaxed and let her grass then become MY idea.
So now to real world a application…
How do you deal with right brain extrovert people that have different ideas then ou?
The technique I tried for this horse was redirecting with a goal of relaxing, to build he relationship. I wanted my idea to feel go. to her. (confession: I did have to use more rein then I would like during this process. I had to CONTROL her some, to retain my safety.)
So our relationship needs improvement in a couple of areas:
- She needs to accept my leadership by respecting/caring about my Ideas.
- I need to have ideas that she can respect/care about. (Hmm, which really comes first?)
- We need to have better communication about relaxation (that she is safe with me).
Just wondering if these steps on dealing with an unconfident and distracted horse will work with people in my life, too…
Can we communicate our ideas others in a way that shows that we care and respect them but also require that we receive the same respect back? Thoughts?