As I sit here, I can feel all of my fears, anxieties & self-doubt circling, pressing in on me like a predator stalking its prey. I’m swarmed by feelings of shame. I didn’t do ______ well enough, or so & so did it better. So & so always does it better.
I’m stampeded by thoughts of blame. “Well, it’s not my fault because….” “I couldn’t do it because….”
As I’m about to go under, I look across the pasture, lock eyes with my horse & hear the words, “Be Still and know that I am God”.
Suddenly, I am reminded of just what is important. God is the ONLY one I need to worry about impressing. And, here’s the kicker– God made me. He created me—this worrisome, fallible, imperfect being. Knowing this, aswell as knowing that God is all-knowing and all-powerful, means that he knew exactly what He was doing when He made me the person I am. Who am I to question His work in me? Who are we to doubt God’s judgment in His creation of us; such wonderfully diverse and unique beings, completely individual to ourselves.
So, where does that leave me? Well, I may not be able to question His work, but nor am I able to understand it. This leaves me with the thought that I need to find a way to accept myself for who I am.
Finding acceptance within ourselves is no easy task. I fully expect each and every one of us to struggle mightily with our preconceived notions of who/how we should be. I also know that trying to be what we think we should be is exhausting. And depressing. After all, who is ever truly satisfied with his/her self?
It’s time to let it go. Let go of the worries, the anxieties, and the fears that you are not who you think you should be; that you are simply not enough. It’s time to trust in God’s work. I honestly believe that finding acceptance will lead to the most vital component in living a healthy life—Finding Peace.
**Do you need help finding peace within yourself? Let the horses help you! Join us this fall for an EAL (Equine Assisted Learning) workshop on Finding Peace**